“When you love someone, you’ll do anything
You’ll do all the crazy things, that you can’t explain…”
Our love for Bryan Adams makes our hearts sing as we hum these lines on and on. What’s more, it transports all the lost hearts, the lovesick ones, to a melodious romantic realm. Sounds like medicine to those ailing from the malady of being broken. Don’t you wish at times that you could stare out the window of your bedroom, soaking the nature in all its glory? Add to that the memory of the one you love and you can trace the smile that adorns your lips. Ah! To know of such a love and be a part of something that pure.
Most of us spend our life in want of that lovesick passion that rules the mind and soul. Waking up in the morning, waiting for the day to begin already. Counting your blessings as each day brings forth a hoard of gifts in all their blessed glory.
The real question however is what to do once you have the love that completes you?
Well it is quite simple, is what one might say. Sure it is, once you know that it is about loving that person, all the while not forgetting to love yourself first. It is no meagre happiness that comes knocking at your doorstep once you fall in love. You cherish it; you shout it out for the world to know. What you should avoid, in fact, is putting it on a pedestal, high above your reach. Once that happens, its steep slope, and you cannot help but slither helplessly down in a pit of hurt.
Someone who is worthy of your love will never put you in a situation where you feel you must sacrifice your dignity, your integrity, or your self-worth to be with them.
The trick is in learning the difference between loving someone and not becoming a mere shadow to him or her. Your world might revolve around them, or they could be the very epitome of that love. Nevertheless, they are not the only thing that exist in the relationship after all. Going blind in their light, to the extent that you never come out of the darkness, is a too big a cost to pay. Then again, why should you give yourself up when they reciprocate a mere morel of their love? The intention here is not to deprecate the love they have for you, but to make one understand that it is not always about them.
Separating your intention of love from the act of pampering beyond limits is what makes any relationship work. One often comes across scenarios where one partner dotes on the other. They tend to the tiniest of their demands, even laying down themselves. The point here is, to what extent is that worth sacrificing yourself. Only to have them walk all over it, without a second glance. To have shards of glass piercing your heart as you watch them soaking it all.
Love is not self sacrifice, but most profound assertion of your needs and values. It is for your own happiness that you need the person you love, and that is the greatest compliment, the greatest tribute you can pay to that person.
You do not live a life of anonymity while they face the sun. You do not squint your eyes, finding your way as you walk on the dark side of the moon, while they glow in the moon’s brightness. No amount of passion, or even obsession, requires someone to hide behind their loved one, as they take the world by the storm. You have an identity of your own, one that makes you cross leaps and bounds to paint the canvas of life.